Monday Night RAW, broadcast LIVE on USA Network from Minneapolis, Minnesota
The review is broken up into 3 parts
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[Q 1] The show starts with a recap of Cena, Kane, Zack Ryder, and Eve from last week.
Backstage Eve is shown talking to The Bella Twins. They ask her about Zack Ryder’s condition and Eve starts to laugh. Eve says that Zack and her were never friends, she was just using him to get to the top and she will do the same to John Cena. She tells the Bella Twins to record her walking into John Cena’s locker room. As she goes to turn around, John Cena is right behind her. Eve looked embarrassed as John Cena walked off.
The RAW intro plays, then John Cena’s music hits and he makes his way to the ring. Before he can speak, Eve walks down the ramp with a mic apologizing to Cena and asking for a chance to explain herself. Cena cuts her off and says she’s been “sipping the skank juice” and using her “assets” to further her career. Cena says he lost his Broski because of the “hoski”.
Cena tells Eve instead of trying to get him, she should wait for The Rock because they are both scandalous bitches. Eve breaks down and starts to cry. She jumps onto Cena and tries to kiss him until WWE officials from the back break her hold. Cena leaves the ring after telling Eve he’s disease-free and would like to stay that way. Eve continues to cry until WWE officials remove her from the ring and take her to the back.
A video package airs of The Undertaker watching Triple H deny him a WrestleMania rematch. Taker says “Your denials are unacceptable. Triple H, your fate is sealed. Every story has an ending; I will write yours tonight.”
JayDub: Well… that was unexpected, but a fun segment.I liked the fire from John Cena. And it’s about damn time seeing as The Rock is gonna bring an inferno for WrestleMania.
[Q 2] [Commercial] An ad airs promoting tomorrow’s live episode of SmackDown, featuring the main event of World Heavyweight Champion Daniel Bryan vs WWE Champion CM Punk.
1. Sheamus defeats Mark Henry (3:13) – Mark Henry takes control of the match from the start until Sheamus attacks Mark Henry at the knee.
Sheamus goes to the top rope and hits Henry with the battering ram. Sheamus then positions Henry for the Irish Hand grenades, but Henry counters and regains control of the contest. Sheamus starts to mount a comeback as he had Mark Henry down in the corner. Sheamus goes for the Brogue Kick, but Henry ducks the move and splashes Henry in the corner.
Henry looked to close the match as he had Sheamus into position for the World’s Strongest Slam, but Sheamus reversed and successfully performed the Brogue Kick. He pinned Henry and won the match.
Backstage Teddy Long enters John Laurinaitis’ office, and Johnny tells him it wasn’t his idea to be the GM of RAW and SmackDown, but he likes the idea. Teddy Long says they should see what the WWE Universe wants. Laurinaitis says he doesn’t care about what they think (as the crowd chants “Teddy”), he only cares about the board of directors think. Laurinaitis books a 10-man battle royal featuring 5 superstars from RAW and 5 from SmackDown, the winner will face CM Punk in a WWE Championship match at WrestleMania. Otunga says SmackDown isn’t better than RAW, and Teddy says anyone on the SmackDown roster can beat him. Teddy then says Otunga with his purple bowtie looks like Pee Wee Herman’s fairy god momma. [Commercial]
JayDub: To quote Jimmy McNulty from The Wire… “I had such f*ckin hopes for us”. Following everything that happened with Henry and Sheamus last Summer I was really looking forward to the next time they stepped in the ring together. Let’s just say this was a whole helluva lot different than what I pictured. It’s unfortunate that Henry’s medical issues have affected his push.
[Q 3] Ad airs promoting The Rock’s appearance on RAW next week.
R-Truth makes his way to the ring, followed by R-Truth. They will team up to face WWE Tag Team Champions Primo and Epico
2. Primo & Epico vs Kofi Kingston and R-Truth (2:22) – Truth and Epico start things off. Truth drops Epico with a clothesline and goes for a quick pin. Primo gets a tag on his partner, unknown to R-Truth. Primo gets into the ring and uses the blind tag to his advantage and takes over the match.
Truth gets the hot tag on Primo, he gets in and starts his signature offense sequence on Primo culminating with the Boom Drop. Kofi is then distracted by Rosa Mendes, who jumps up on the ring apron. The ref focuses his attention on Rosa, which allows Epico to get into the ring and attacks Kofi by dropping his neck on the top rope. Epico jumps out of the ring and is attacked by R-Truth.
Primo tries to capitalize off of the mayhem with a Backstabber attempt on Kofi, but Kofi reverses and hits Primo with Trouble in Paradise. Kofi pins Primo and wins the match for his team.
Michael Cole hype the #1 Contender’s Battle Royal, featuring The Great Khali, Santino, Dolph Ziggler, Wade Barrett, Chris Jericho, Kofi Kingston, R-Truth, The Miz, Cody Rhodes, and The Big Show.
Jerry Lawler teases an announcement about the next inductee into the WWE hall of Fame. [Commercial]
JayDub: So Truth and Kofi are a tag team now? I’m not even gonna ask what basis that’s on…
The latest inductee in the 2012 class of WWE’s Hall of Fame is revealed to be Ron Simmons.
Highlights are shown of Chris Jericho’s exit from the elimination chamber match last night.
Backstage Josh Mathews interviews Chris Jericho.
[Q 4] Jericho says he was never eliminated from the chamber and says Punk has no conviction or heart for letting the decision stand. Jericho says he is the best in the world, and he believes it in every fiber of his being. He says tonight is the end of the world, and every superstar in the battle royal will understand what he’s saying and CM Punk will know it to be true. [Commercial]
JayDub: I can’t wait for this feud with Jericho and Punk to kick into high gear, but according to him the world is gonna end every damn week.
David Otunga makes his way to the ring, accompanied by John Laurinaitis. Ezekiel Jackson comes out next, accompanied by Teddy Long.
3. David Otunga defeats Ezekiel Jackson (1:37) - Zeke starts to dominate Otunga until Otunga blocks his advances with a kick to the knee. Otunga then drops Zeke with a clothesline and applies a sleeper. Zeke fights out of the hold and regains control of the match.
Zeke goes charging towards Otunga in the corner, but he ducks out of the way. Otunga then hits Zeke with his finisher, The Verdict. Otunga pins Zeke and wins the match.
Recap of Shawn Michaels confronting Triple H last week. The Undertaker’s feet are shown as he walks to the ring and the announcers promote his appearance next. [Commercial]
JayDub: Wow, these matches tonight are a total waste.
[Q 5] The Undertaker walks to the ring with a hood over his head. He looks at the WrestleMania 28 logo and then starts to speak. He says for a year he has thought constantly about the beating Triple H gave him at WrestleMania. He says he has been living in a Hell of uncertainty that he can no longer bear. Taker says he challenged Triple H to end the uncertainty, but he never expected the answer he got. Taker says the choice wasn’t Triple H’s to make, and they are on the verge of an apocalypse of an era because they are the last of their kind.
Taker claims that the suit, tie, and corporate liabilities are just layers to cover up who Triple H really is. He says Triple H can lie to Shawn about the situation, but he will not lie to him. Undertaker then challenges Triple H to come out and look him in the eyes. Triple H’s music plays and he walks to the ring with a suit and tie on.
Triple H starts to speak, but Taker yells at him to “Shut up”. Taker tells Triple H to save his pity, and calls him pitiful for his excuses to avoid the match. Triple H says their fate is not to end it” but to make sure “it” carries on. Triple H says he has the responsibility to insure that WWE is still around, and Taker’s responsibility is to be the leader and carry the torch. Hunter says it would be bad for business.
Taker questions whether Triple H is scared of losing, but he says it would just be bad for business period. He says he’s never been more certain of anything in his life. Hunter says Undertaker is asking Triple H for an end. He claims that Taker knows Triple H will beat him, and that he wants to happen. Triple H says he won’t be the man to end it and starts to walk out of the ring. Undertaker calls him a coward, and Triple H gets back into the ring.
Triple H starts to get angry at being called a coward, but stops and tells Taker that the answer is still “No”. Triple H gets out of the ring and walks up the ramp. Taker says Triple H knows that he can’t do what Shawn Michaels couldn’t do, because he knows Shawn was always better than him. Triple H takes off his suit jacket and tie, and gets back into the ring. Hunter says it has nothing to do with Shawn Michaels, because he couldn’t get the job done but he knows he can. The crowd starts to chant “Prove it”.
[Q 6] Triple H then asks if the Undertaker really wants a match at WrestleMania. If so: he’s got it. But Triple H says he will only face Undertaker under one condition: a hell in a cell match. Undertaker leaves the ring. [Commercial]
JayDub: Great segment. I’m still in disbelief that they convinced me that doing this match again was a good idea. And this is how it’s supposed to be done with gimmick matches, not forcing feuds into them just for the hell of it.
World Heavyweight Champion Daniel Bryan comes out to the ring. The commentators announce that he will face Royal Rumble winner Sheamus at WrestleMania with the title on the line.
Daniel Bryan says the audience should consider him a role model because of his accomplishments. He says he defeated 5 men in the elimination chamber and is still world champion.
Santino makes his way to the ring and is announced as Daniel Bryan’s opponent.
4. Daniel Bryan defeats Santino Marella (57 seconds) – Santino starts to strike Bryan with punches, but Bryan blocks his attack and uppercuts him.
Santino starts to gain momentum and mount a comeback. He goes to pull out the Cobra, but Bryan attacks him from behind and he drops the sock. Bryan attempts a back drop on Santino, which he reverses into a roll up pin attempt. Bryan kicks out and applies the LeBell Lock. Santino tries to reach the cobra sock, fails to do so, and taps out.
The commentators tease the main event for the live SmackDown and the upcoming battle royal match. They also mention that John Cena will appear later in the night to address his WrestleMania opponent: The Rock. Another ad airs for the Super SmackDown LIVE. [Commercial]
[Q 7] 5. The Bella Twins defeat Kelly Jelly and Aksana (1:17) - Kelly Kelly and Bella 1 start the match. Kelly faceplants Bella 1 and goes for a quick tag to Aksana. Bella 1 quickly takes control of the match before Aksana trips her. Bella 1 throws Aksana into the ring ropes while Bella 2 gets in the ring. Kelly tries to even the playing field, but the ref tells her to get out of the ring. While the ref is distracted, the Bellas pull twin magic and Bella 2 hits Aksana with a facebuster and pins her for the win.
Backstage John Cena walks to the ring to address The Rock. [Commercial]
John Cena says he used to love to chant “The Rock” but he is no longer The Rock or the People’s Champion, he is a champion with people. He starts to talk about how The Rock has an entourage of people and is unapproachable. Cena says he doesn’t respect The Rock, but he respects Dwayne Johnson for his box office hits and the fact that he can make his “boobs bounce”.
Cena says he’s had the same problem with Dwayne for 7 years. Cena says when Dwayne shows up next week he should raise an eyebrow, hold his fans in the palm of his hands, and kick it back to Hollywood. Cena says that’s exactly what will happen. Cena says this isn’t a movie promotion for him, because what he’s most proud of is the fact that he always shows up and has never left.
Cena says Dwayne left the first time he got a taste of the bright lights of Hollywood. Cena claims that the only reason he came back last year was to promote Fast Five and launch his Twitter account. Cena says WrestleMania means everything to him because he’s fighting for everyone backstage whose dream was to be a WWE Superstar and STAY a WWE Superstar. He says he fights for everyone who is proud to be a professional wrestler. He says the Monday after WrestleMania he will still be in WWE and The Rock will be on a movie set laughing at his stunt double.
Cena then promises The Rock that he doesn’t have the “club in the back” and says Rock will have to kill him to beat him. Cena says he will defeat The Rock at WrestleMania, and ends with a kiss at the camera and “See you next week, movie star”.
The commentators tease The Rock’s return to WWE next week and the upcoming battle royal.
JayDub: About damn time! I wish Cena would get out of his comfort zone more often, because he’s great when he’s like this. He didn’t seem defensive or even threatened by The Rock at all. He really needs to step it up to make this thing work, hopefully this continues.
[Q 8] [Commercial] CM Punk joins the commentary table and the battle royal competitors make their way to the ring.
6. Chris Jericho wins the #1 Contender’s Battle Royal to earn a shot at the WWE Championship at WrestleMania (12:15) The competitors start out the contest brawling with each other. The eight other participants all try to eliminate Big Show and Khali. Big Show fights his way off the ropes, but Khali is eliminated. [Commercial]
Miz and Kofi duke it out on the outside ring apron but Truth makes the save for Kofi. Cody Rhodes and Wade Barrett work together to try and eliminate Big Show, but Show blocks the attack and starts to dominate the match.
[Overrun] R-Truth and Kofi Kingston throw Miz over the top rope, but he lands on the ring apron. They both dropkick him and he is eliminated from the match. Kofi and Truth then set their sights on Big Show, but he simultaneously chokeslams both before everyone goes for the finisher the melee. Barrett attempts to Wasteland Santino over the top rope, but Santino reverses and ends up eliminating Barrett himself. Seconds later, Santino also eliminates R-Truth.
Ziggler dropkicks Santino, then Big Show Gorilla Presses Ziggler out of the ring and onto Truth and Barrett. Ziggler’s face bounces off of the announcer’s table and his body lands on Wade Barrett’s arm, who screams in pain.
Kofi, Santino, Jericho, and Cody all team up to try and eliminate Big Show, but he flicks them off. Kofi and Jericho battle while Cody Rhodes and Santino attempt to eliminate Big Show once again. Kofi gets the upper hand on Jericho and then jumps to the top rope, but Jericho pushes him off the turnbuckle and eliminates him from the match.
Santino, Big Show, Chris Jericho and Cody Rhodes each take a corner of the ring as a stretcher is brought out to the ring. Jericho, Santino, and Rhodes all gang up on Show. Cody hits Show with the Beautiful Disaster kick, Jericho with the Lionsault to Big Show, and Santino with a headbutt. Jericho throws Santino over the top rope, but his feet don’t touch the floor and he makes it back in the ring to hit Jericho with The Cobra. Cody Rhodes eliminates Santino and yells to him “Your 15 minutes are up!”
Jericho and Rhodes attempt to double suplex Big Show, but he suplexes them both in return and then eliminates Rhodes. Rhodes doesn’t leave ringside and holds on to Big Show’s legs and helps Jericho eliminate him. Jericho wins the match
Post-match Punk poses with the WWE Championship on top of the announcer’s table. Punk gets into the ring and extends his hand to Jericho, but he just smirks and walks off.
The show ends with a promo video hyping The Rock’s return to WWE next week.
JayDub: Good match with an ending we all saw coming. Now that the WrestleMania card is becoming official, WWE REALLY needs to step things up because besides just a few minutes of this show it was mostly a friggin waste. They’re doing a great job with Taker/Triple H, but other than that nothing is to the level that it should be. A month of Jericho’s return was useless, and he’s now finally getting some direction so his feud with CM Punk is sure to deliver. The main feud leading into WrestleMania is suffering because one guy is hardly there, Rock returns for an extended stay next week and that feud should improve also. I’m holding on to hope that WWE will turn it up for WrestleMania, I’m just hoping it starts sooner rather than later.
